Archive for neuro-linguistic programming

Jun
26

My Prostate Cancer Was a Gift

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“Cancer Dude” Joe Johnson recently interviewed me about my experience with prostate cancer, and that video is available below. If you watch and listen to our discussion, you’ll learn about…

  • How prostate cancer brought out the best in me.
  • How I consider myself lucky to have gotten cancer.
  • How I discovered the meaning and greater purpose of my cancer.
  • How cancer transformed my ability to receive help.
  • The importance of BELIEFS for a man with cancer.
  • The importance of creating a “healing team” to support you.

You’ll also hear my advice for men with cancer.

If you would like to share your experiences or respond to anything mentioned in this interview, please include your comments below.

You can learn more about Joe Johnson and his work at www.cancerdudes.com. His post about this interview can be found at http://www.cancerdudes.com/terry-hickey-interview/.

P.S. Do you want to share this post? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

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Jun
19

Working with Unidentified Limiting Beliefs

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As you may already know, I have created and actively use a Belief Breakthrough Method™. Learning to work at the level of beliefs is paramount in your coaching profession. Beliefs and values, even unconscious beliefs, trump behaviors. Our behaviors are organized by what we believe.

All too often you’ve heard that if you challenge people on their limiting beliefs and suggest an empowered belief, encouraging them to embrace that new belief, it will work. I have found that it often doesn’t. It only works if people were already in the process of changing or challenging their beliefs anyway.

The reason is that if somebody already knows what their limiting belief is, they are already in the process of changing. The most powerful limiting beliefs are the ones that we are unconscious of or unaware of. Those do not easily present themselves, and they are the ones you need to learn how to uncover.

Here’s where it starts to get confusing…

The best way to uncover these beliefs is when you have determined what goals your clients want to achieve. If they are unable to succeed, you will need to help them understand why they haven’t been successful in achieving their goals. In order to do that, you have to understand and uncover their particular understanding of how this happened, which I refer to as their map of the world. Keep in mind that beliefs do not stand alone; they are part of a person’s larger belief system, so changing one belief will have an effect on other parts of the system. Keep in mind the larger context.

It’s important to understand that limiting beliefs present themselves in a number of ways. Sometimes they show up as “part of me wants this, but another part of me wants that.” In that case, it’s important to work with those competing wants.

“I can’t do something” is another indicator. Once you hear that, you must ask additional questions, like “what would happen if you did do it?” The answer will help you determine and discover the underlying limiting belief that supports why the person can’t do it.

When you are working with a client to change a limiting belief, make sure that the new belief comes from your client and that you explore carefully the definite and possible consequences and effects of making that change. There are sometimes very good reasons that someone might not have made a change.

I like to collect stories about belief change experiences. If you have any interesting ones, please share them below so I can comment on them in subsequent articles or posts.

 

P.S. Do you want to share this post? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

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May
22

Are You Communicating Your Message for Maximum Impact and Success?

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It seems like there’s been a change in the way new businesses operate these days. While older, more established businesses have gradually shifted their focus from employees to shareholders, new businesses—especially small ones—seem to be doing “larger” things. They are creating causes and making a difference. These differences aren’t just with their clients but with their families as well, in terms of money, self-esteem and modeling. It’s pretty powerful.

For example, Holistic MBA Live featured over 450 holistic entrepreneurs who wanted to learn how to create a successful business using their unique models of health care. I saw powerful transformations and commitments take place in many attendees, and what I realized is that I was witnessing the birth of several movements in health care. The processes that the attendees went through made it possible for them to connect fully with their missions and purposes.

What I believe this means is that these practitioners are the vanguard of a revolution in the delivery of health care services. Why do I think this? Because part of this conference was focused on creating effective marketing, and some participants learned to be so effective that by the end of the weekend I fully believed that they are part of a movement to take back our health care.

Ultimately, attendees learned to have clarity about what is important to their audience and about how to broadcast their messages. If each one of them touches 1,000 people, their collective messages will have a tremendous impact.

So what does all of this have to do with you?

Marketing!

Are you able to communicate your message in a way that will effectively market your mission and purpose? Do your marketing methods identify you as a mover and a shaker?

Remember, if you aren’t listened to, you can’t have an impact.

Like the participants of Holistic MBA Live who are already successfully promoting their missions, you have to create a way to be seen and heard, whether through writing or stepping forward in public. You also have to have a powerful message. If you don’t, you won’t be able to do the work that you want to be doing in this world.

In order for you to have an impact, and in order for your mission or movement to make a difference, it is imperative that you effectively market yourself. Are you? If not, have you taken steps to learn how? Do it, and do it today!

>>>

If you put this or any of the other tips I’ve shared to good use, I’d love to hear about it. Please share your comments below.

P.S. Do you want to share this post? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

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Apr
17

Are You Willing to Do What It Takes to Succeed?

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This question alone presupposes that success is a measure or reflection of the actions you’re willing to take.

It’s easy to do what is easy for you—the problem is when what you need to do to be successful is difficult to do. When studies take a look at successful entrepreneurs and businesses, one thing they all have in common is their willingness to do what it takes to succeed. In general, this meant doing the things that were difficult, things that took determination.

Not that you can’t delegate, but you may need to make that extra telephone call, write that extra e-mail, or make that decision that affects your finances… because the failure to do so might slow the growth of your business or movement.

Spend some time thinking about the answer to this: “What are the steps that, if I took them, would make a difference in my business?”

This question presupposes that you actually know the steps and that something would need to happen for you to take them. If you discover that you don’t yet know the steps, that in and of itself can preclude you from taking action.

These seemingly simple questions can generate the kind of answers that, if you’re willing to act on them, will give you big results.

I’ve been watching my spouse define her new business. She’s been an inspiration because she’s been putting in long hours to make it happen. It hasn’t been easy; it’s been a struggle. At times she’s been frustrated, and it’s only been her commitment to following through the process that has made her stick with it.

So if you’re struggling (and if you’re in business, of course you are), it just means that you’re on the right track, and you need to ask yourself these questions.

Since you’re used to me talking about beliefs, I haven’t left those out. As you ask yourself the questions above, you’re likely to come across some of the following questions that reveal underlying beliefs:

  • Is the struggle worth it?
  • Are you capable of achieving success?
  • Will what you do make a difference?

You’re not likely to get to these beliefs unless you’re willing to take on the questions above. Answering all of these questions for yourself will reveal if you’re willing to do what it takes to succeed.

I would love to hear how well this approach works for you. Share your feedback and comments below.

P.S. Do you want to share this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

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Mar
27

2013 Download of the Month Club

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Let Terry Show You The Power of Your Beliefs

The Belief Breakthrough Series™ 2013 Download of the Month Club delivers hypnotic recordings that work in harmony with your unconscious mind to change limiting beliefs.

With these recordings, you can release limiting money beliefs, accelerate business success, activate positive inner attitudes and habits, and create vibrant health!

For example, this month’s download is about Increasing Wealth in Your Life. It was created to help you discover how wealth is much more than money. See last week’s post for an excerpt from the corresponding letter to members of the 2013 Download of the Month Club.

Invest just $14.97 a month

OR

Make one payment of $149.70 for a full year
(a savings of $30).
 

Join now to receive this month’s download and to ensure that you get all of the remaining recordings for 2013.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

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Mar
20

How to Increase Wealth in Your Life

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The idea of increasing wealth in your life presupposes that you know what wealth is and that there are ways to increase wealth.

Understanding what wealth means to you is also important—is it money or something else?

Wealth is one of our universal experiences. Everyone has some idea of wealth; it just means different things to different people.  I have been particularly interested in this theme because it often emerges when I’m coaching.

Many of my coaching clients want to increase the amount of money they make, and what I discover is that money represents something. It is often expressed as some equivalent such as, “If I had more money I could do _______ or be _______.” The idea is that such an outcome will lead to happiness. When we believe that happiness depends on outside factors such as people or things, especially money, we are caught in a dilemma. That idea is a myth; your happiness depends on your appreciation of what you are and how you are in the world, not on external people or events. All too often we focus on externals to try to achieve happiness.

Focus on appreciating what you have. Be grateful for that, instead of sad and anxious about what you don’t have. Some people go so far as to keep a gratitude journal, noting on a daily or weekly basis what they are grateful for. It works!

This post came from my letter to members of the 2013 Download of the Month Club. They will also receive the corresponding recording along with guidelines for their hypnotic session. Interested? Join now to receive this month’s download and to ensure that you get all of the remaining recordings for 2013—for just $14.97 a month.

P.S. Do you want to share this post? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

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Mar
11

Experience a Day of Transformation!

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Belief Breakthrough Method™

Day of Transformation

March 21, 2013 in San Francisco

9 a.m. to 4 p.m.

Are you ready to…

  • Experience remarkable shifts in your core money and success beliefs to create the life and business you’ve dreamed of?
  • Serve yourself and your clients at a higher level?

Then join me for an exciting day of business and personal growth! This intimate small group experience (with a maximum of 10 people) is designed to help you experience this by breaking through the personal barriers holding you back.

I hear from clients, coaches and wellness entrepreneurs every day about how their unconscious, hidden inner struggles prevent them from capitalizing on all their training investments. They feel defeated and perplexed when they don’t reach the financial benchmarks and the audience they have so carefully planned for. This frustration happens at every level of business as entrepreneurs endure ever-expanding challenges. They experience success, but know they are capable of much more. Something stops them.

At worst, entrepreneurs may begin to give up on their dreams, give up on believing they “have what it takes” to share their messages with the world. They hurt. And they think it’s their fault. They are wrong.

You can have all the how-tos, tips and strategies—and even know exactly what to say and when—and still get stuck when it comes to the success you envision.

Why? Because it’s not just about the how-to!

Creating the life and business of your dreams is an inside job. Without a clear idea of your hidden limiting money and success mindsets and beliefs—and the ability to change them—all of the how-tos and strategies can fall flat.

This Day of Transformation is about uncovering YOUR personal mindset blocks—the emotional barriers that keep you discounting, undercharging, doubting yourself and more—and then eliminating them.

When your “inner game,” or success mindset, is aligned with your outer game, the “how-to” of X, you’ll be amazed at how quickly money flows into your life and business with ease and grace.

Changing limiting beliefs requires up close and personal attention, not available in conference settings, larger mastermind groups or do-it-yourself programs. Because of my 40 years of study and expertise, I can help you quickly identify and change the key obstacles to your success.

Plus, a one-size-fits-all approach never captures your true magic. By co-creating with me, your unique strengths are illuminated so you tap into your core beliefs, values and who you need to be to realize the future you’ve imagined.

Step up and act on this affordable opportunity so you…

  • Banish your deflating self-doubts
  • Create money-inspiring beliefs
  • Gain confidence by standing firmly in your value and power
  • Break out of old perspectives that stand between you and your goals
  • Inspire your clients by creating genuine excitement in yourself

What you’ll get:

  • A Day of Transformation featuring an intensive small-group experience AND individual coaching with me
  • A Belief Breakthrough Pre-Retreat Assessment to identify your desired money and success goals and target what is stopping you
  • The support of like-minded coaches and wellness entrepreneurs

Be one of the first 5 to register, and you’ll receive my CD Hypnotic Recordings for Confidence, Wealth and Purpose, sessions that work in harmony with your unconscious mind to change limiting beliefs.

Register Now!

Join Terry, Master NLP Practitioner and Trainer and Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™ acclaimed by 6- and 7-figure coaches, for this exciting day of business and personal growth!

Call Terry at 520.237.4435 if you have any questions about this opportunity.

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Feb
26

How to Create Lasting Changes by Applying Systems Thinking to Your Beliefs

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“A decision is only as good as the processes used to produce it.”

This idea is the basis for Einstein’s premise that you cannot solve a problem with the same kind of thinking that got you into it.

You can gain more insight into your beliefs and ways of acting by applying systems thinking to your own system of thinking, because our beliefs are themselves a system. Yes, that’s a little confusing, so I’ll say it again, “You can gain more insight into your beliefs and ways of acting by applying systems thinking to your own system of thinking, because our beliefs are themselves a system.”

Mental Models

We have habitual ways of thinking that we fall into time and again. Our beliefs underlie how we approach problems, what we even think problems mean, and the kinds of solutions we’re willing to consider. This overall way of understanding our thinking is referred to as mental models: mental because they exist in our minds and motivate our actions; models because we construct them from our overall experiences.

Mental models are common—everyone has them. Our early learning, our experiences, our overall “map of the world” forms the basis for these models. These in turn form our beliefs as we apply them to real life. We form them. We hold onto them. They are ours. We even talk about “having beliefs” or “adopting beliefs” or “acquiring beliefs.” We will defend them from attack. We also talk about holding them or even abandoning them. When we do abandon a belief, it’s gone for good, and there the void that remains needs to be filled by another belief.

Processes That Keep You Stuck

Our mental models are personal and deep rooted, and they predispose us to act in certain ways. That’s why it’s often difficult to learn from mistakes because oftentimes what may be called a mistake is actually “justified” based upon our particular models. We mistake our view for reality—because in our mind, it is.

So, how can you use this? If you continue to experience similar difficulties or problems, you must consider this: “What are the underlying beliefs that are getting you—and keeping you—stuck?”

One way to think about it is that we create blind spots. This is the phenomenon of deletion. We are selective about what we notice. Based upon what we notice, we form ideas and take action. There’s a plethora of information that we fail to pay attention to. Sometimes adopting a new form of self questioning, like “What am I failing to consider?” presupposes that there is information out that that you haven’t noticed, and the question itself will open you up to considering that other information.

The opposite of the blind spot is the idea of constructing meaning from something that isn’t there. Your mind will make meaning out of a gibberish sentence or misspelling because it knows what should or ought to be there. For instance, just because someone questions us, we might assume that they don’t like us. This assumption was probably formed long ago, and there may be no basis for it, but we act as if it were true. We may continue acting this way, as if that were true, rather than challenging that assumption.

The next part of the mental model that is problematic is distortion. Distortion is how we change our experience—emphasizing some parts and discounting others. It can even be the basis of creativity or paranoia. When we distort events, we give weight to some experiences more than others. For example, many gamblers continue to believe they can and will win, despite the fact that they keep losing. Their minds reframe the losses as near wins. Another example is jealousy. A jealous person can distort all sorts of everyday events into painful, threatening possibilities.

Finally, there’s generalization. We create all of our mental models by taking experiences and making them represent groups. For example, a child witnesses how his father treats his mother and can generalize from this experience how men should treat women. One of the problems is that once we generalize, we can become blinded to other possibilities. For example, someone may generalize from an earlier coaching experience that didn’t work out and decide that coaching doesn’t work.

Taken all together, these mental models—deletions, distortion and generalization—are the basis of our learning and creativity and all of our beliefs, including the ones that serve us well. From a systems viewpoint, we want to be able to examine how these four principles combine and how they reinforce. They are the loops that keep the system in place.

The implication for all of this is that you have to be able to step back and begin to notice how your system is working. As is often said in earlier writings, if you change one belief within a system, that may not be enough because a system, by definition, is made up of many reinforcing and supporting elements. It will usually not suffice to just change one part of a system.

This article was inspired by The Art of Systems Thinking: Essential Skills for Creativity by Joseph O’Connor and Ian McDermott.

P.S. Do you want to share this post? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

Categories : Coaching Tips
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Jan
13

Last Chance for January’s Coaches’ Intensive Program

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Belief Breakthrough Method™

Coaches’ Intensive Program

January 26-27, 2013

At the Loews Ventana Canyon resort in Tucson 

Three Reasons to Register Now 

Reason #1: Eligibility for Terry’s new Intensive Graduate Program and Certification—only those who have attended a Coaches’ Intensive Program can attend this new program, tentatively set to begin in February 2013.

Reason #2: The new Bring a Friend Discount—if you and a friend both register for this month’s Intensive, you will each get $400 off the currently listed price. This is the lowest rate available. E-mail my Client Care Manager at adele@adonai-llc.com for more information about this option.

Reason #3: Transformation—this mid-winter getaway at the Loews Ventana Canyon resort in Tucson can transform your business and your life! 

Take advantage of this opportunity to work with Terry in a small group setting where you experience your own breakthroughs while learning how to facilitate breakthroughs for your clients.

  • Would you like to learn WHY you and your clients get stuck and what to do about it… FAST?
  • Would you like a step-by-step system that will help you and your clients change faster and with greater ease?
  • Would you like to receive your training from a recognized Master of transformational change?

Remember, as a newsletter reader you can get a $200 discount off the listed price by using the code subscribe in the Shopping Cart during checkout.

If you want to catapult your ability to change those troublesome beliefs that are stopping you and your clients in their tracks, then register for this Intensive now!

Belief Breakthrough Method™ Coaches’ Intensive Program

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Jan
11

Achieve Your Goals by Setting Well-Formed Outcomes

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What I want to accomplish in this post is to explain how you can achieve the goals you want while attending to the conditions necessary to do so. In yesterday’s post, Have You Set SMART Goals?, I described the SMART conditions necessary to achieve goals. One you have described the goal, this Outcomes process will ensure that you achieve your goal.

Well-formedness conditions are the set of conditions your outcome must satisfy in order to produce an effective and ecological result. A particular goal is considered “well-formed” if it meets the following conditions.

A well-formed goal can be…

  1. Stated in positive terms.
  2. Defined and evaluated according to sensory-based evidence.
  1. Initiated and maintained by the person who desires the goal.
  1. Made to preserve the positive by-products of the present state.
  2. Appropriately contextualized to fit the ecology of the surrounding system.

Goals should be stated in positive terms, for the unconscious mind does not understand a goal stated in the negative. So a goal like “I don’t want to be broke” or “I don’t want to be sick” would need to be changed into what someone does want. Try asking a question like this: “If you weren’t broke, what would you want instead?” It’s easier to motivate yourself towards a positive outcome.

Next, you must be able to measure the outcome against a destination or benchmark. So ask something like this: “What will let you know you are moving towards your goal?” (This also implies knowing when you are not moving towards your goal.) You can flesh it out further by asking yourself or a client, “What will you see, hear and feel when you have achieved your outcome?” Get information that is as specific as possible.

Make sure that the achievement of the goal depends on what you do, not on what someone else has control over. For example, if you say, “I want my boss to respect me,” that is not in your control. If you were coaching someone in this instance, you could ask, “What would your boss be doing if he were respecting you?” The response to that could then lead to asking how your client might behave to get the desired response.

Keep in mind the idea that all behaviors have a positive benefit in some context. For this example, consider someone who wants to stop smoking. It turns out that for this person, smoking helped manage stress. Unless the new behavior includes a way to manage stress, the original positive by-products will not be maintained. Missing this can result in what many people label as self-sabotage. This is where thinking systemically is helpful.

Lastly, you want to explore the areas of context and ecology. By context I mean looking at the areas you want the outcome in. Sometimes you might mark out the goal as absolute, using words like always or in all areas. Consider that in some areas an old behavior might still serve you, and in some contexts a new behavior might actually be a problem. To assess this, ask questions like, “Will getting this outcome be a problem for anyone else?” or “Could having this outcome be a problem for me (or you, in the case of a client) in any way?” Achieving a new financial goal might potentially cause alienation in a family. If you become very successful, a partner might feel threatened. Asking the right questions teases these issues out so they can be planned for.

Now you have several ways to check your goals… and your clients’ goals. Using this process in conjunction with the SMART process should make your goal setting much more successful.

Good luck in 2013, and may you achieve what your heart desires!

I would love to hear what you think about this. Please share your feedback and comments below.

P.S. Do you want to share this post? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

Categories : Coaching Tips
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Coaches Intensive Program

• Quickly Break Through Money Plateaus
• Gain Confidence, Clarity and Inner Peace
• Banish Your Limiting Money Beliefs