Archive for Newsletter Articles
Breaking It Down to Beat Overwhelm
Posted by: terry | Comments Comments Off on Breaking It Down to Beat OverwhelmI had a follow-up call with a former client today, and within the first few minutes he began describing a sense of being overwhelmed. It became clear to me that he had linked together a number of experiences so that when he thought of any one of them, he immediately pictured all of them and became overwhelmed.
I asked if I could offer some suggestions, and he consented. I told him to take the list he had made of everything he needed to do and use a pair of scissors to cut the list apart.
I wanted him to create distance between the items by separating them and positioning them on the floor away from each other. I mentioned that this might help him breathe better—given that his breathing had become irregular when he started describing his sense of overwhelm. As he laid the pieces of the list on the floor, he calmed down and said, “Oh, some of these really are separate.” He then added, “Now I can see what needs to be done first.” And he breathed easily.
Like many people, this person had a visual representation of what was overwhelming him—a bunch of things swirling around together in his mind, even though they didn’t necessarily go together. This exemplifies how every problem has a structure that keeps it in place.
It’s important to help people break their problems down into smaller components so that they can address them individually. I don’t tell people how to organize their issues or prioritize their problems, but I do help them chunk issues down into more manageable pieces.
Are your issues—or those of some of your clients—really as unmanageable as they seem?
P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/
Are You Using the Language of Success?
Posted by: terry | Comments Comments Off on Are You Using the Language of Success?Using Presuppositional Language to Help Clients Succeed
One of the skill sets we taught physical therapists in Alaska involves using presuppositional language in a very specific way. The pattern that appealed to them most was one in which you presuppose an outcome. For example, if you’re working with someone to reach a specific goal, one way to help them achieve it is to ask questions like this…
“When you’re operating in a healthy way, what do you imagine you’ll be doing on a daily basis?”
OR
“While operating in a healthy fashion, what do you imagine you’ll be doing on a daily basis?”
In the first case, the when presupposes what follows, and in the second, while serves as the word that presupposes what will follow.
It can be helpful to recognize that this pattern can be used to presuppose failure as well. It’s what you put the focus on, positive or negative, that determines the outcome. One of the things that can be helpful is to notice if your clients are already using this language pattern themselves. If so, are they using it to presuppose failure?
To adopt language for successful outcome, coaches could say…
“After practicing this pattern, what do you think will be different?”
OR
“Once you’ve done this, what will be different?”
Both examples presuppose that the action will have happened. Notice that these questions orient people to the future, creating an already-accomplished experience because of the presupposed success.
Overall, I have found that presupposing success or achievement is very helpful to people.
P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do, just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://www.terryhickey.com
Addressing a Fear of Criticism
Posted by: terry | Comments Comments Off on Addressing a Fear of CriticismThanks to each of you who submitted a tip request last month. This month I’d like to address the following question from one reader.
Lately I’ve noticed that I still have a huge fear of criticism. Consciously I tell myself that it’s okay to fail and make mistakes—that I don’t care what people say. I also remind myself of my belief that the only opinion I care about is God’s. However, I’ve noticed that deep down inside that’s not the case. I often find myself in unfavorable situations where, if I evaluate it, my fear of criticism is still looming large. Read More→
Resolving Limiting Money Beliefs
Posted by: terry | Comments Comments Off on Resolving Limiting Money BeliefsThis article emerged from my work with my How to Banish Bad Apple Beliefs and Enjoy the Abundant Fruits of Your Money Tree groups.
Resolving Limiting Money Beliefs: “I can’t make too much money or I will lose something important.”
by Terry Hickey
For coaches and healer-types, this is a very common limiting belief. It is often manifested as a struggle between wanting to have a more financially fulfilled lifestyle and wanting to stay true to a mission, such as being spiritual or family-focused. This struggle creates anxiety, lost opportunities and is often described as, “I sabotage myself”.
I recently worked with a high end coach who expressed this belief by saying, “If I really make the kind of money I am capable of, I will have to give up spending quality time with my son or have someone else watch him and I can’t do that”. Read More→
Resolving Limiting Money Beliefs Part 2
Posted by: terry | Comments Comments Off on Resolving Limiting Money Beliefs Part 2This article emerged from my work with my How to Banish Bad Apple Beliefs and Enjoy the Abundant Fruits of Your Money Tree groups.
Resolving Limiting Money Beliefs: If I Become Successful I will Have to Leave the People I Care About Behind
by Terry Hickey
Imagine that you had an opportunity to make an additional 100,000 dollars. This income would make a real difference in you or your family’s circumstances. You knew what you needed to do to make this opportunity possible but you weren’t doing it. In fact the idea of actually succeeding brought up fear and created immobility because you thought success meant you could lose the affection of the people you care about. Read More→
