Are you where you want to be?

Just before leaving Los Angeles I had dinner with Melissa Wilhelm and her husband John. Melissa has been developing her brand and has been pursuing what she wants. She’s yet another person I saw this summer who has demonstrated a willingness to go for a dream. Her husband John has also been doing work he loves. He recently left a safe job to go for a dream job. As we talked a familiar theme emerged: going for a dream requires managing anxiety and uncertainty. You must be more committed to your dream than reality.

After heading north I connected with one more client, Jack Austin. We had a chance to reconnect and review some of our earlier work together. Jack is one of the most well educated coaches I have ever met. He is always reading a new book or exploring a new training. He laughingly acknowledges that he has to resist jumping in with sharing information or theories, but his knowledge is helpful for ultimately understanding clients’ motivations and experiences.

I made it to San Francisco the next morning and connected with several people on my social media list as well as friends I grew up with in Peru. One of my favorite people, Nancy Marmalejo, invited me over for dinner and asked me to stay. What a wonderful visit. Those of you who know Nancy know what a wonderful way she has of moving through the world. She has created a home that honors her grandmother, a healer, by creating sacred spaces and herbal gardens. We had a wonderful reconnection and went for a walk, enjoying the wonderful park and lake nearby.

Prior to my trip I let my connections from Peru know that I wanted to connect with fellow Peruvians or expats; that was one of my trip goals. One of the responses was an invitation from Cynthia Bolton (pictured with me at right). We shared such a unique childhood that still unites those of us who grew up in La Oroya, Peru. She and her husband live near Oakland and have a spectacular view of the bay and San Francisco.

After leaving their house I was off to northern California. I went up Highway 101 and avoided the freeway so I could enjoy the coast and the redwoods found in northwest California and southern Oregon. I let myself meander along the coast, stopping to enjoy the beaches. Just by taking my time, I found a great grove of redwoods. To be in their presence is to feel at one with the ancient ones, the lungs of the earth, or as my teacher Don Américo would say, the Waiki trees.

Crossing into Oregon is at times to see crowds of people enjoying the beaches, but if you go on some of the smaller roads, it’s quiet and peaceful.

I had a destination in mind for that state as well. I was connecting with one of my childhood best friends, Alfredo Arguedas. He lived next to me, and his sisters and my siblings were very close. As kids, we spent hours hiking and target shooting. He went to school in Lima while I went to Kentucky, and we reconnected in the summers. He and his wife Deb now live in McMinnville, Oregon, on a rural 10-acre plot where they raise horses and chickens. They are watched over by their dog, who takes her job seriously. I had a marvelous time with him and caught up on all that transpired after we both left Peru. Alfredo did two tours in Vietnam as a Marine, then went to Marine Officer Candidates School and eventually retired as a full colonel.

Alfredo relayed a tearful story about returning as a consultant to Vietnam and being teamed up with a former captain of the North Vietnamese Army. They spent every morning before work drinking tea, and in the process he found an inner peace that had previously eluded him. He also visited an area where he had been stationed and put some old ghosts to rest.

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If you’ve been following me for any length of time, you know that this summer’s road trip was on my bucket list and is one of many dreams I’ve realized.

Have you set aside some time to evaluate where you are and where you want to be? If you haven’t taken the time for this self-evaluation, don’t wait any longer. Sit down and start daydreaming, brainstorming and planning! Once you figure out what you want, figure out how to make it happen.

Note: This is the second installment of a series about my trip. Check my Facebook page and blog for additional posts.