Applying NLP Approaches: Why You Should Follow the Recipe

Spending time on my book during a recent weekend retreat allowed me to think about what I want to accomplish right now. There’s nothing like writing to sharpen my awareness. I thought through the idea of belief change and what I do that makes the work I do possible. I’ve become an expert in my subject matter, so writing involves trying to capture what I do and describe it in an understandable manner. I’ve found that when I write, the problem often isn’t knowing what to say but weeding out what not to say. The process is as much about winnowing as it is about creating.

During my weekend retreat I also caught up on professional reading, focusing especially on content from Steve Andreas’ blog. As I mentioned above, he was one of my Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) trainers, and his writing is inspirational to me because he’s thoughtful and approaches NLP in a very logical, scientific manner. When you make a decision to master coaching or a particular kind of coaching, it really helps to select representatives of the area of expertise you want to master. Reading about their thoughts and approaches expands your thinking about your own way of doing things, especially if their way of thinking is different from yours.

My approach combines intuition and Steve’s logical approach. He has taught me to consider this question: What is going on to make the change possible? And further: What are the processes that are making this change possible? If someone can show you a way to think through these questions, you’ll have a way to understand how what you are doing works. That thinking can allow you to create your own innovations and patterns.

This process is similar to cooking. When you first start out, it’s useful to follow recipes, particularly with baking. There’s a science behind that, and if you skip some of the steps or processes, you won’t get the right results. If you understand the science, however, then you can experiment. To become a really top-notch baker, you’d probably need to learn the chemistry behind successful baking.

This is true with NLP. Coaches often experiment with the steps of different techniques without understanding what each step is intended to do. Using the swish pattern as an example, Steve notes on his blog that he found more than a dozen videos online in which NLP practitioners failed to follow the steps of this pattern appropriately in order to successfully address unwanted habits. Those who left out some of the steps weren’t seeing successful results. He explained why it wasn’t working and the importance of each step in achieving success.

What Steve alerted me to again is the idea that you need to do things in a particular way in order to consistently have success. You have to follow the recipe.

My reading included works by two other authors who apply an understanding of neuroscience to influence behavior. Robert Cialdini’s Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion is about why people buy. It’s kind of a Bible for sales people. His new book is Pre-Suasion: A Revolutionary Way to Influence and Persuade. This is about how you can set in place principles or ideas prior to a sales conversation. There are certain things you can do to help people to get into a buying frame so they even consider buying. This book is useful because it’s based upon brain science. Not only does it help you understand how to conduct marketing and how to get people to take action, but it also equips you to recognize what’s going on. When reading this book, you begin to get an understanding of how to alter your own marketing based on what makes a difference for people.

Carmen Simon’s Impossible to Ignore: Creating Memorable Content to Influence Decisions is also based on neuroscience and research but focuses on message delivery instead of marketing. In his testimonial about this book, Cialdini notes that the author “has broken the mold by showing how to enhance memory for our good ideas—not just in ourselves but in others.” Here are some of the premises Simon shares:

• When your message is easy to remember, you become impossible to ignore.
• When something stands out, people won’t forget it.
• If your presentation is not significantly different, it won’t be remembered.

She points out that a willingness to be different, to be unusual and to take risks will make you stand out, and people will remember you. Her work is about putting the power of cognitive science to work for your business.

I’ve benefitted from reading each of these books and definitively recommend them for you and your coaching business.

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I like to collect stories about belief change experiences. If you have any interesting ones, let me know or post them below so I can comment on them in subsequent articles or posts.

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About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/